Something is wrong with me. I’ve lost my mojo, whatever that is. I had it once, maybe a couple of times. I think it comes in spurts.
I wrote a book once. I even had two publishers who wanted to sign me to publish it. I picked one and began the long process of – I’m not even sure what. My book was put on the schedule to hit the stores more than 18 months later. I didn’t know any better. I thought this was normal. What I didn’t know was that this was a blazing sign of a publisher that had over-reached and would eventually implode under the pressure of their good intentions.
But I’m not here to whine about how they went out of business and my book remains unpublished. This isn’t about them. This is about me. I called this post “Accountability” for a reason.
I could blame the publisher’s demise for my unpublished status but if I look at the facts, I just can’t. While I was signed, I was so active. I wrote short stories that were destined for anthologies and web-exclusives. I started new novels. I began to develop a strong web presence on social media.
Then I stopped.
The weird thing is, I really want to be a writer. It’s something I still can do, even though I’m rapidly approaching 50. I just need to get off my ass and put in the work. I think I am inherently lazy. I’ll cocoon myself in excuses to not do the work. I’d rather sit in silence and do nothing with a wheezing cat on my lap. (The wheezing cat is Odin and he is pictured above. He was having a bad day. ) I have even done housework to avoid writing. But to accomplish what I want I have to stop making excuses and being lazy.
This is my first step in being accountable. Without a publisher checking up on me, and encouraging me and making me do my work, I’m asking for you to fill in. The beauty of this is that you don’t have to do anything. If I believe you’re out there and believe that you’re reading this and are aware of my goals, that should be enough motivation. I don’t know for sure. Let’s just call it an experiment for now or me grasping at straws.
Now comes the point where I state my goals. I’ve written a lot of stuff. 99.9% has never seen print. I have a short story. For now let’s call it “Vibrancy”, mostly because I can’t find a better name. I believe it’s an excellent story. I just don’t know if I executed it well. I sent it to an editor and paid her $20 to tell me what was wrong with it. The pages came back bleeding with comments. Goal #1: Make the revisions to “Vibrancy” and submit it somewhere for publication. From this day forward I’m giving myself two weeks to do this. During that time I’m going to type out as much of the writing I’ve accumulated in long-hand.
Next week, I will post another blog and report to you what I’ve accomplished. If this works, I’ll keep posting and keep adding goals as I get closer to getting my mojo back. I answer to you now and this is where I’ll do it.